The discussion resumed over the weekend and I feel emotionally 'opressed' by the outcome of our talks. I don't even know where to start but let me say this, I am not a happy camper with the situation as is.
I was aware going into marriage that it wasn't going to be all sunshine and roses. We took a vow to love and stand by each other because that is what you do. You are there for each other during the good, the bad and the ugly times. Only I can't decide if right now we have bad or ugly times. I tend to think the latter, given the emotional roller coaster ride I have been on lately. It makes me doubt my love, makes me doubt the feelings I have for this man that is my husband. And really? I hate to feel that way. The question remains if I can mend my feelings or if this is indeed the beginning of the end.
That being said, here is the 411 on what went down.
- his argumentation was that men are attracted to females
- it is a game for him, the chase, the excitement, the affirmation of his masculinity
- he loves me and doesn't want to lose me but he wants the sensation or thrill of something new
- he would love for me to be involved
- me? I was just so shocked I hardly got in a word and we left it at that. We did however do something that I will post more about later on during the week. Something we both could agree on. Something that was equally appalling as it was exciting.
3 comments:
This sounds like he's saying...he's going to do it either way? with or without you?
@ Swistle, that is what I understood as well. He did row right back saying that it isn't the case but the damage is done. How can I trust him now? We did come up with a solution for now that I will post about when I have more time ;o) Thanks for sticking around though and listening to me whine.
Wow. You and I should be best friends. I don't want a threesome, but Bill and I coming apart at the seems and sex is playing a role in all of that. Oh, and I would really love to be able to fall for someone else. The love's been out of our marriage for quite sometime. Stop by and see me sometime...
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